Is there such a thing as negative criticism?

Maybe getting criticism doesn't have to be so negative . . .

As writers, we can be so sensitive about our work. Our writing is an extension of our very selves, and getting criticism is never easy.

“To avoid criticism say nothing, do nothing, be nothing.” Elbert Hubbard

I understand. Getting my work read by other people has always been a bit scary for me, from book reports to college papers to my new book. I put so much of myself into my writing, and I'm never quite sure if my readers will get what I'm trying to say.

So if you're like me, give yourself a break. You're not alone. There's a whole world of writers out there who share your feelings. It's okay to be afraid. But here's the thing . . . it's not as okay to avoid vulnerability in your writing. If you do, you are missing an opportunity to be truly honest in your work. And if your work should be one thing, it's that.

But maybe you're one of those writers who never intends to share your work. I get that too. No judgement here. I've got pages of poetry that I'll probably never share, that I just wrote for myself, to get my feelings out on paper.

But if you want to be a published author one day, you've got a decision to make. You can let the fear of rejection or negative criticism control you. Or you can choose to take all criticism - whether good or bad - and make it CONSTRUCTIVE for yourself. It doesn't matter if it was intended to hurt or help you . . . you have to CHOOSE to let it help make you a better writer.

Be your own sifter: filter everything you hear or read, eliminate the things that you can't use, and let the rest be a tool with which to evaluate your work. And if you are the writer I believe you to be, you can take a bit of criticism and still come out standing.

I know it can be hard to hear. Sorry, guys, I specialize in tough love. But remember, that's still a kind of love. ;)

Let your acceptance of criticism be an exercise in self love, for you and your work. Let it build you up, not tear you down. Let it inspire you to action. Future you will appreciate it!